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I'm a dreamer.
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.
Back to where it all began... 
12th-Sep-2009 07:39 pm
Back before there was myspace or facebook, a good friend introduced me to livejournal. It's the first place where I was really able to put it all out there. They say myspace and facebook are good to connect, but it's really just another way for you to try to impress everyone. It's all fake. Those "friends" could care less about you and everyone's always trying to one up each other. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of acting like I'm someone I'm not. I'm tired of watching what I post to make sure I don't offend anyone. I want to be able to hash out my feelings without my other half reading it and it starting WWIII. This is not how my life was supposed to turn out. I'm a good person with dreams and ambitions of greatness. And it doesn't make me a bad person just bc I'm never going to be happy in a small closed minded town where everyone is happy with life just passing them by. I'm tired of being a housewife/stepmom. I want to go out and have FUN again. I want to travel to places I've never been, taste new foods, and meet new interesting people who make me look differently at the world. I'm emotionally and mentally tired and beat down. I don't know how much more I can take before the little amount of light in my soul is stomped out and gone forever. 
Comments 
13th-Sep-2009 08:24 am (UTC)
It's good to see you back here. I was pleasantly surprised.

"I'm tired of watching what I post to make sure I don't offend anyone."

Couldn't agree more. I'm afraid to even curse on myspace of facebook, for whom I might offend. When did my being afraid of what other people think come into play in my life? I even catch myself censoring myself on here sometimes. Not cool. You gotta be true to yourself. We, as artists, have to be true to ourselves.
'You can't not tell secrets' to paraphrase Stephen King.

Wow. I'll stop there. I'm about to go off on a whole tangent - mostly directed at myself - that probably shouldn't be directed as a comment here.

Smile, lady. And breathe. (Deeply)
It helps, I promise.
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